Can you put yourself on a pedestal?
perhaps you are better, just say it
I guess we’ve all been at this place where we have believed in our core that we don’t know better and others have it easily figured out. We’ve been in this place where we may have given other people so much power over us that we could have easily lost ourselves in the process. We tend to not just focus on our limiting beliefs but start to feel comfortable in them too. We tend to put ourselves down and feel like we just aren’t there and we never will be because we don’t have it in us. We just aren’t good enough.
When we’re trying to figure out our lives and when we see everything around us, we start to accept everything we see at face value. We tend to start allowing what we see cloud our judgement and who we are because we don’t feel what we’re doing or how we are is how we should be or want to be. The more we allow other people in our heads, the more we lose our confidence, our identity, and our sense of belonging.
And this is how we get influenced by others. The more we question ourselves and give in to our limiting beliefs, the more influenced we get by other people. And that plays on a loop for a long time. What we don’t see is the number of times we succeed when we quietly believe in ourselves.
I feel that as an introvert, I’ve been battling this for a long time. I used to always feel that others are better than me. They are more social, confident and intelligent and so successful whereas I’m lost and I don’t know any better. So naturally, I put them on a pedestal. This is also conditioned when society tends to accept one personality and all the other kinds of people are always under scrutiny.
Because I was the quiet one, I was often called, boring and shy and scared and not confident. I often met people who were exactly the opposite of me and naturally, I started questioning myself. I didn’t feel comfortable being myself and I wanted to be someone else. Not particularly because I didn’t like me but because I wasn’t accepted as who I was. The more I kept putting other people on a pedestal, the less confident I felt about me and I started comparing myself to them. I felt inferior and somehow wanted to find something that would help me become like others.
After a few very difficult times and moments in my life, I was completely exhausted. I distanced myself from a lot of people and that little downtime gave me perspective. I started accepting myself more. The things I liked and disliked, the choices I made, and the kind of life I wanted to live. This downtime also made me realize that people don’t know any better, it’s just that we feel less confident about who we are, and when we look at other people, we tend to confirm our limiting beliefs. Sometimes the people we put on a pedestal are inspired by us too and because we are so busy giving into our limiting beliefs, we don’t even see it.
I’ve also noticed that a lot of the time we feel slightly awkward and guilty to say that maybe we’re better or know better than most people. We feel we’re doing something wrong by saying that we know better, atleast about our life, our choices, our opinions., I’ve been there and it would always feel like I’m doing something wrong by saying I am better.
It’s not about making someone feel inferior, it’s about not making us inferior but about confidently showing up and standing up for ourselves.
Putting yourself on a pedestal can feel like a battle. It also feels like we could be coming off as overconfident and egotistical but the important thing to remember here is that we aren’t putting anyone else down, we are acknowledging our potential and what we bring to the table. The difference here is that we do all that by not waiting for anyone else’s approval, acceptance, or validation but by taking the time out to validate, approve, and accept us for who we are.
Anytime we start to get mesmerized or overly impressed by someone, it’s a great feeling and we should stop to acknowledge them but the minute we start to compare ourselves and say, oh look at them and look at me, that’s when we unconsciously put them on a pedestal.
We all matter and have something unique to offer. But we aren’t always taught to put ourselves on a pedestal just out of the fear that we may get carried away. I’ve faced this fear before and what has always worked for me especially when I find the courage to say, I’m good or I know better, is a little bit of gratitude for who I am. I pause to feel grateful and I practice a little bit of grounding exercises just so I don’t lose my grip on reality.
When I encourage you to put yourself on a pedestal, I’m not asking you to shout it out loud but rather feel it within. Repeat it daily in the form of a silent affirmation prayer. Meditate on it and allow yourself to feel it. The more you feel it, you’ll notice that change in your mindset and your behaviour too.
There’s a simple analogy, the way we view ourselves is how we think the world sees us. So, if we think we don’t know any better, the world around us will appear that way to us and we’ll feel even more insecure than we already do. If we constantly affirm our limiting beliefs and keep questioning our worth, the world will catch on to that vibe.
In my experience, putting yourself on a pedestal is not to prove anything to anybody, it’s a form of self-love. It’s a way to remind ourselves that we aren’t less or inferior and we don’t really need anyone else to really accept, approve, or validate us. We will slowly start feeling more at peace and the chaos will fade away.
If you think, you need a little bit of guidance and awareness when it comes to putting yourself on a pedestal, perhaps I can help. I’d like to invite you to work with me and give yourself just 12 weeks and see how things start to unfold for you.
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