Optimism is a good start
when your world falls apart
I want to begin by asking you, what do you do when your world starts to crumble and you are left with nothing but uncertainty?
The past few weeks have been challenging and stressful, to say the least. I’ve been through the most difficult time emotionally, physically, and mentally. Life became uncertain and all I could think of was, when will this nightmare end? I just want to wake up. I want my life back.
In these past few weeks, I’ve experienced a lot of hopelessness not to mention pain and loads of anxiety. Literally and emotionally. Things I was very sure of, started to fade away and it all came crashing down. I started to question a lot of my beliefs and I started to question how everything started to fall apart so badly.
Naturally, when you’re in the midst of the storm it makes no sense to question how did the storm start in the first place. All you really want to do is be patient and let the storm pass. Allow all that noise to calm down and let everything settle down. Even if everything is chaotic, you wait for it all to settle down. And that’s exactly what I needed to do. Even though I was in much pain all I could do was let it all calm down.
When it did, I was left with nothing. I was left with a mess and I didn’t know how to clean it all up. I didn’t know how I would gather my feelings and pain. I didn’t know how things would get better. At that moment, when everything fell apart, I could only rely on one thing. Hope. And it didn’t come easy. It usually never does.
I had to let go of a lot to allow that hope to fill in. I had to create space to feel light and calm. I had to stop questioning the past and allow myself to look forward to what was to come. Nothing was neat and clean but it felt messy and chaotic. It took a lot of effort to remind myself that I had to let the past go and make way for the good that is to come.
Optimism can be so uplifting when we allow it to act as a balm instead of questioning it. When we let it work on its own and not interfere by obsessing over what happened. It is easier said than done, believe me, I know. But when you’re left with no choice, it can be extremely helpful.
What I’ve learned these past few weeks is that optimism is not just a feel-good word, it has energy, and the way we allow this energy to work for us, it can make all the difference in our lives. We can either get in the way or let it do the work for us. I’ve learned that when I allowed optimism to take over after I was tired and defeated, I stopped obsessing about all that had happened. It gave me the courage to let go of all that I needed to let go of. I found myself smiling slowly and looking at things that gave me joy.
I realized I started talking about all the things I would do once physically I would get better. And I honestly started seeing a major shift in my energy. Of course, there was still a lot of restlessness and impatience but each time that happened, I allowed optimism to take over.
Optimism for me is just slowing down and trying to not control anything. This of course is not that easy but I’ve felt that it helps to just let everything go and be calm. I try to not force myself to think positively because that usually doesn’t happen organically but I do lean on a lot of quiet time and that helps.
Instead of forcing myself to think positively about that situation, to allow more hope, I try to do a little bit of scripting and visualize my life in general. I’ve noticed that scripting uplifts my energy a lot and I feel like everything is okay and calm and will unfold in the best way possible. The idea is to just write down the kind of ideal life I would love to live and stay in that feeling for as long as I want to. I’ve hit rock bottom before and this technique has always helped me stay optimistic.
Hopefulness is usually a good sign and a good start if life has been crumbling down and things have been too dark. In a way, we aren’t actually starting anything but just rebuilding in a way and that can be really challenging. But having hope and allowing ourselves to feel hopeful can be a game changer. It's okay to take your time for that change to happen and to actually feel hopeful again about life but slowly it can actually work and help us move in the right direction.
There is no way to quantify how long it takes for us to be hopeful again, the amount of hope one requires, or how long after we start to feel good but, it is a great start to rebuild.
I hope that on your darkest and most anxious days when you feel as if your world will never look the same again, you remember this little post and allow yourself to feel hopeful, even if it doesn’t come naturally to you in those moments, may this serve as a reminder that you will hope soon.
If you’d like to work on this together these are a few options that you can choose from -
Join the Pause, Breathe, Dream counselling program
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